Aug 27, 2014

My haircut...

Category: Captain's Logs
Posted by: wivvle
Meow to all my kitty-friends!!!  I have a semi important topic to share with you today.  First and furmost, I must show you a picture.  Recently, (as in about 5 months ago) my pets (humans) gave me a haircut.  Now, most cats hate haircuts, but truthfully I appreciate them.  You see, I am a longhaired, fluffy kitty living in South Louisiana and the HEAT GETS CRAZY HERE!!!!  The humidity adds approximately 10 degrees to the weather, so we have the real temperature and something called "Real-feel".  Real-feel is what the temperature feels like due to the variations in the humidity levels..... ummmm, the humidity levels seldom ever change in S. Louisiana from March til the end of October.  ANYWAY, I was getting HOT!!!!  So, my pets decided to give me a haircut.  Now, this haircut was horrible, awful, pitiful and downright stupid looking, but it felt great!!!   I was free of the burdensome hair that was suffocating me.  I felt lighter and cooler.  I felt like I could fly!  

Now, the only problem with this haircut was the actual look of the cut.  I looked silly.  I know that I didn't make it easy for my pets to cut my hair.  I kept rolling over expecting to be worshipped, that's what they were doing afterall, right?  Anyway, if they had given me this haircut to make fun of me, then I would have had to correct them for their insolence, but, as you see, they pathetically did it out of devoted love for their king.  Suckers.  They were trying to make me comfortable though, and that is really rather kind of them.  I know some kitties that would discipline their royal subjects for making them look foolish, but a true kitty ruler must understand his subjects aren't capable of high quality stuff.  A true kitty ruler must also understand his fragile minded pets (humans) intent.  If the intent was to ridicule the kitty, then of course you should banish those pets (humans) from your kingdom, but if they are truly trying to help, then you must put up with their inferior attempts and realize that they were only doing their best.... as pitiful as that might seem.

All this to say, that I am just now starting to grow in my new hair for the fall and winter, and I am starting to look nice again (and by nice I mean lady-kitty attracting nice)!   I love this time of year.  This is the season that the Kitty-king looks his finest!